I like the mailbag. You give me the topic and I pontificate for 1,000 words. Today we have another disguised and distorted letter from an unidentifiable and possibly fictional reader: I would love to ...

I am not a big crier. I shed tears, if I had to guess, every few months or so. But my best friend? She cries at everything: Movies, love songs, memories, how adorable our dogs are—and, of course, ...